BY CLOVIS ATATAH
Deathly Chair
In the game of musical chairs, participants desperately try to beat each other to a seat. The final two try all kinds of antics to be the person on the envious seat when the music stops. But in Balikumbat, it is usually a game of deathly chairs.
The music at the grand finale is the staccato clatter of busy firearms or breaking bones. In the last scene, a diabolic but dexterous lion performs a macabre death dance. As the curtains close, the lion devours the hapless person on the chair who had mistaken the game for musical chairs.
As blood trickles down his jaws, he announces that he murders in the name of a certain Lion Man. Last weekend, this game of deathly chairs was played out again. The SDF District Chairman for Balikumbat, John Kohtem, was devoured.
The nation is shocked! For a while now, the average Cameroonian has been indifferent to the actions of the Lion Man. Granted that there was a lot of anxiety over the transformation of a normal person to l’homme fantôme. But everybody knows that a Lion fantôme can be more dangerous than a normal lion.
Be that as it may, as soon as the average Cameroonian was assured that the process of transformation from a normal l’homme lion to l’homme lion + fantôme, he stopped giving a damn about what ever the fantôme was doing to rig elections.
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